Thursday, July 16, 2009

Go or Go Home!

I had the opportunity this past week to watch qualifying for the NASCAR race in Chicago. For those of you not familiar with NASCAR racing, there are 43 starting positions in the race. Usually there are more cars than that that show up to try and make it into the race. The cars that are in the top 35 in owners points are guaranteed a spot, so all of the cars that show up outside of the top 35 have to qualify their way into the big show. For this particular race in Chicago there were 11 cars competing for 8 spots. These 11 cars are considered go or go home cars. Basically their whole weekend is riding on their being fast enough to make the field in the 2-lap qualifying run.
That’s a lot of pressure. A driver has two laps to make a fast run or his team ends up putting its equipment back on the car hauler and heading back to Charlotte without even racing. Think of all those wasted miles, driving out to Chicago or Las Vegas or California and not making the race. All the preparation is for naught if a racing team cannot make a good qualifying run. This past weekend 3 teams made that long, disappointing drive home without the chance to race.
When you are a team that is trying to qualify, you do everything legally within your power to try to make the field. The preparation that goes into a qualifying round is extensive. The team’s one goal is to lay down the fastest possible lap it can. As is said in other sports, “It’s do or die.”
What if we started having that kind of focus in our lives? What if in our careers we treated each meeting or presentation or client like it was go or go home? What if for our health and well-being we started making going to the gym a do or die activity instead of thinking, “I’ll try.” The amount of preparation put into qualifying on a go or go home car is intense. If we put that same amount of preparation into the important aspects of our lives, I promise we would start accomplishing more.
I use a system that Charles M. Schwab, president of Bethlehem Steel, learned from a man named Ivy Lee, whose objective it was to sell him services to make his business more efficient. It is called the critical six. At the end of each day make a list of the six most critical tasks that you need to complete the next day. The key is that they be critical for moving you toward your goals. After you number them in order of importance, complete them the next day in that order and check them off as you do. Any unfinished tasks automatically become your most important tasks for the next day. By doing this you will stay on task to complete the most important steps toward personal success. Start treating your life as go or go home. . .to win the race of life.
For more in-depth coaching on winning in life or in business, check out my website below.
Erik Elsea
www.erikelsea.com
Quote of the Day!-“If you don’t have time to do it right, when will you have time to do it over?” –John Wooden

Monday, July 13, 2009

Celebrating Those First Victories

Celebrating Those First Victories!
A couple weeks ago Joey Logano celebrated in New Hampshire what many believe will be the first of many victories in his career in New Hampshire. At age 19 he is the youngest driver to ever win a Sprint Cup NASCAR race. A first victory is special on so many levels. It is special just for the fact that winning a race is a huge achievement. It is proof that all of the training and hard work have paid off and were worth it. You earn a respect from the people with whom you race. But most importantly you prove to yourself what you already knew: I can do this.
I am writing this because our lives are full of firsts. The victories that we have in life are not always celebrated with champagne, confetti and a beautiful girl’s kissing your cheek but they are just as important . . . and so maybe should be.
It seems to me that when we were children a lot of firsts were celebrated. A first birthday was an important family event. Our parents were overjoyed when my siblings and I took our first step or said our first word, and they have a photo of each year’s first day of school.
I want to remind everyone to keep celebrating those first victories. They are important! Don’t miss a one. Your first anniversary. The first day of work in a new career. The first day of school to continue your education. The first sale you make at a new job. Reward yourself and acknowledge these accomplishments. If you can go all out with the champagne, confetti and even the beautiful girl’s kissing your cheek, then do it. You are telling the universe that you gladly receive all the victories in your life and you are ready for more to come.
Erik Elsea
www.erikelsea.com

Friday, July 10, 2009

Deal with your Emotions

Last weekend’s NASCAR race had a spectacular finish with cars piling up and sliding across the finish line. Kyle Busch was leading the race but ended up getting loose and wrecking when he tried to block Tony Stewart. After slamming into the wall and getting hit from behind by Kasey Kahne, he ended up falling to 14th place. To go from leading with less than a half mile to go to finishing in 14th place because you got spun out would make anyone upset. The problem for Kyle was that the replay showed clearly that it was not Tony Stewart’s fault.
Kyle did not have the opportunity to view the replay before climbing out of his car, visibly upset. He went stomping down pit road toward victory lane, stripping off his gloves and his helmet because he was going to give Tony a piece of his mind . . . and maybe then some. About halfway down pit road the NASCAR officials corralled him. It took about eight of them to force him into a truck to be taken to the infield care center, where he could be checked out and persuaded to cool his temper.
I have been watching racing, involved in racing and behind the wheel of a race car long enough to have seen this scenario played out many times. In this case it didn’t lead to a fight or the loser slamming his car into the winner’s car like it usually does. In this case NASCAR officials got to Kyle first and gave him a chance to cool down and maybe even see the replay so he knew that he was not wrecked on purpose.
How many times in our lives have we let our emotions control our decision making and our actions? I am as guilty of this as anyone. But I have gradually come to realize that as emotions go up, intelligence goes down. We all need to concentrate on leaving emotion out of major decisions in our lives. When we are emotionally attached to the outcome of something, it is like we have blinders on to the rest of the world.
I have seen people so emotionally attached to a relationship that they stay in it even though it is suffocating them. I have seen people so emotionally attached to a business or investment that they refuse to see its failing until they are completely broke and sometimes buried in debt. The point: if you want to change your life, change your thinking. Leave your emotions at the door.
Remember: when emotions go up, intelligence goes down!
Erik Elsea
www.erikelsea.com

Thursday, July 9, 2009

How Do You Want to Win?

How Do You Want to Win?
I had the pleasure of attending the Coke Zero 400 at Daytona this past weekend. For any of you who follow this blog regularly, you know that racing, and in particular NASCAR racing, is a huge passion of mine. It is right up there with the coaching and consulting I do. Helping people win in life and in business correlates with my passion for racing. What made this weekend even better is that I was able to share the experience with someone who had never been to a race.
It was an amazing race, with all the excitement one could expect, especially as someone’s first. Going to the mecca of NASCAR racing on the Fourth of July, celebrating everything that is great about America and seeing a phenomenal finish was awesome. The lead changed in the last lap; then the lead driver slammed into the wall and triggered a massive wreck—all the elements of racing excitement in one event.
Tony Stewart was the eventual winner, and it was his handling of Kyle Busch’s wreck that impressed me most. It was Tony’s car that got Kyle Busch loose coming out of turn 4, but when Kyle moved up the track to block him, Kyle’s car was spun sideways and into the wall at over 180 miles per hour. Even in the stands we could see from the replay on the Jumbotron monitors that is was nobody’s fault. It was a fact of racing: everyone’s fighting for the same piece of real estate and going for the win. Tony Stewart came out on the better end of the deal this time, but even as he crossed the finish line, he was on his radio, saying “I don’t like winning ‘em like that.” He was also extremely humble in all his post-race interviews, making sure that everyone knew he was not at all happy about what had happened to Kyle Busch.
A term in racing says it all: “clean.” This means racing tough but not wrecking your opponents on purpose in order to win. Tony Stewart raced Kyle Busch “clean,” and that brings me to the point of this blog. Are you racing everyone clean? I know successful people—successful by society’s standards, anyway—who did not win honestly. I wonder, “Did they truly do what was in the best interest of their client, their relationships, their family, and their business partners, or did they put their winning above and beyond everyone else in their life?”
How do you want to be remembered? As someone who was fair and honest or someone who tried to win at all costs? Wrecks happen in life as well as in racing. What matters is where your intentions lie. Make decisions that you can sleep with at night. Let the past be history and move on to race “clean” for the next victory.
Erik Elsea
www.erikelsea.com

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten, by Dr. Robert Fulghum – July Book Review

Like most people, I have a going on in my life. Between work and family and keeping up with the normal hustle and bustle of life, I, like others, tend to forget the simple pleasures in life and miss the bigger meaning in the little things. This book by Dr. Robert Fulghum reminds all of us of the significance found in our relationships with others and in everyday occurrences.
So often I find myself forgetting to slow down and smell the roses. My schedule is extremely full. When life starts to overwhelm me, the essays in this book help bring me back to the basics and remind me what is truly important in life. And when I get right down to it, I did learn it all in kindergarten.
(From the book)
ALL I REALLY NEED TO KNOW about how to live and what to do and how to be I learned in kindergarten. Wisdom was not at the top of the graduate-school mountain, but there in the sandpile at Sunday school. These are the things I learned:
Share everything.
Play fair.
Don’t hit people.
Put things back where you found them.
Clean up your own mess.
Don’t take things that aren’t yours.
Say you’re sorry when you hurt somebody.
Wash your hands before you eat.
Flush.
Warm cookies and milk are good for you.
Live a balanced life: learn some and think some and draw and paint and sing and dance and play and work every day some.
Take a nap every afternoon.
When you go out into the world, watch out for traffic, hold hands, and stick together.
Wonder. Remember the little seed in the Styrofoam cup: the roots go down and the plant goes up and nobody really knows how or why, but we are all like that.
Goldfish and hamsters and white mice and even the little seed in the Styrofoam cup: they all die. So do we.
And remember the Dick-and-Jane books and the first word you learned—the biggest word of all—LOOK.
Everything you need to know is in there somewhere: the Golden Rule and love and basic sanitation, ecology and politics and equality and sane living.
Take any one of those items and extrapolate it into sophisticated adult terms and apply it to your family life or your work or your government or your world and it holds true and clear and firm. Think what a better world it would be if we all—the whole world—had cookies and milk about three o’clock every afternoon and then lay down with our blankies for a nap. Or if all governments had a basic policy to always put things back where they found them and to clean up their own mess.
And it is still true, no matter how old you are: when you go out into the world, it is best to hold hands and stick together.
(End of book excerpt)
I have read this book three times in my life. As far as I’m concerned, that is way too few. As complicated as I have made my life, I need to be reminded more often to keep it simple. We all want the same basic things in life. They just come wrapped in different packages. This book will help you realize how truly special the gifts in your life are.
To order your copy of this book or look at past book reviews, visit www.erikelsea.com/books/.

Erik Elsea
www.erikelsea.com
Quote of the Day! “We are not held back by the love we didn’t receive in the past, but by the love we’re not extending in the present.” - Marianne Williamson

Friday, July 3, 2009

Would You Rather Be Right or Rich?

Would You Rather Be Right or Rich?
I was amazed today when my appointment for an interview didn’t show. I am in the process of hiring one exceptional agent to handle my real estate business in Cape Coral. I thought I had found that person when a lady who had owned a boutique brokerage up north for 12 years responded to my ad. She explained to me that she had lots of experience but her license here in Florida was currently inactive. If she went to work anywhere, because of the state of the economy and her current financial situation, the new company would have to cover or at least advance her dues to the local real estate board. I understood. We have all been through tough times financially, and those dues are about $1200. We had a really nice conversation on the phone, and I thought she might be the one. I did not give her all of the specifics because I wanted to get to know her some in person and make sure she was going to be a good fit for our company. None of that happened.
I had sent her an e-mail confirming the time and location: 1 pm at a model home for a builder who is affiliated with our company. I specifically picked this location because it was the closest meeting place to her home to which I had access. I arranged my day and schedule around this appointment because our phone conversation and her reply to my e-mail, saying that she was looking forward to the meeting, made me hopeful. There was only one problem: she thought the meeting was at 10 am. I double- checked my e-mails to her, and she had obviously misread them. They clearly stated 1 pm.
When she didn’t show, I was really surprised. I waited until about 1:15, then called her, thinking maybe she had gotten lost. She answered and was angry with me because she had been there at 10 am, “like she wrote down.” She was sure she was right about the time. However, although I didn’t bring it to her attention, the time was there in black and white in the e-mail to which she responded. I also know I had other commitments this morning that would have precluded me from making another appointment.
However, in good faith, I changed other plans and met her later. Regardless, she went off on me because the construction guys who work in the model home failed to acknowledge her and she was left waiting for ten minutes. She was in the “right” that they should have greeted her, but I wondered why she hadn’t politely asked one of them where I was. She started blaming me for their rudeness, and I found myself trying to explain and apologize for something that was completely out of my control. She was angry with me for standing her up (which I didn’t), for the guys in the model home not giving her the time of day (I can’t be responsible for anyone other than myself.) and for driving all the way there (when I had picked a place as close to her as possible). She was dead set on letting me know she was “right.”
I knew then that she was not the one. You see, I needed a partner, someone to handle the day-to-day operations of a real estate business, someone who would be customer oriented and get along with all of us. This woman was more intent on being right. She was argumentative and confrontational. She didn’t take the time to check the correctness of her information (by rereading my e-mail) and did not seem inclined to admit mistakes or express humility. She would rather be right than “rich,” rich being relative, especially for someone who needed to borrow $1200 to renew her license.
I am not immune to wanting to be right, but I’ve learned it is not all important. In fact, it has cost me in my life: jobs, friendships, business partnerships, personal relationships. I am writing this today to remind myself and others that no one has to always be right. The only person anyone has to prove anything to is himself. Remember we are 100% responsible for ourselves only. Being right can cost you a lot in life. It cost this lady one heck of an opportunity.

Erik Elsea
www.erikelsea.com
Quote of the Day! – “Whether you think that you can, or that you can’t, you are usually right.” –Henry Ford